July Movies
There is a pretty
wide variety of films coming out this month. Some big, some small and one where
Pac-man is big and one where Paul Rudd is small. To kick off the month of July
we have a sequel, a prequel and a pre-sequel. Sounds confusing right? Well it
is!
Arnold is back in
the prequel/sequel Terminator Genisys (I know, it’s not a real word)
which is the 5th in the series and seems to erase all previous Terminator films
with that confusing tool of time travel. I tried writing an article about this
film, but went on for two paragraphs about how the Terminator series works. If
you haven’t seen the first two then SEE THE FIRST TWO. They are legit American
classics. I own them. I will lend them to you. In the first Terminator a cyborg
time travels to kill Sarah Connor who will one day give birth to John, who is
the future leader of the resistance against the cyborgs of the future. Another
future soldier, Kyle, also time travels back in order to stop the
time-travelling cyborg. He does. The sequel takes place years later and
features a new evil shape shifting cyborg going to kill teenage John and a good
cyborg shows up to protect him. He does. Genisys begins with Kyle receiving the
mission to save Sarah. When he arrives in the past he finds that the good
cyborg beat him to the punch by going back decades earlier and raising Sarah to
be a warrior. She is played by Danerys - a.k.a. dragon lady - from Game of
Thrones. Action mayhem ensues along with time travel nonsense.
My write up for Magic
Mike XXL will be noticeably shorter than my Terminator write up because I
did not see the first Magic Mike. I’m sure it was entertaining because it has
Channing Tatum in it and right now he is one of the more entertaining people
out there. Seems like he wears little clothing in these films. I imagine
there’s a market for that.
Then we have the
prequel to the Despicable Me films called Minions - because apparently
there was a call to tell the tale of the short little creatures that speak
gibberish. I never saw the Despicable Me films, although I do intend to, but
from the trailer I can see that they are just hysterical. Even without seeing
the first movies, I want to see this one. It has them searching for the best
villain to serve because that is their reason for existing, which is pretty
cool.
We enter some
bizarre territory with Self/Less where a dying Ben Kingsley signs up for
an experiment that puts him into a new body. That new body is Ryan Reynolds, so
that’s not too bad. Of course, the origin of where the body came from is shady
and things get out of control when he learns too much. This is the 5th film
from Tarsem Singh and while not exactly a household name, he did make The Cell,
that super weird dream movie with Jennifer Lopez 15 years ago, and he made
Mirror, Mirror. So he jumps genres but makes films that have an interesting
look to them if nothing else.
The Bronze features Melissa Rauch, Bernadette from
Big Bang Theory, as a former Olympic Gymnast (I’m guessing a bronze winner) who
feels threatened when a young local athlete begins to steal her thunder.
Rauch’s character is described as being foul mouthed and as an interesting side
note, she wrote the film with her husband. I’ve seen a lot of episodes of Big
Bang Theory and can’t imagine Bernadette cursing. This intrigues me.
Because it’s summer
we have a Marvel film coming out and this one is Ant-Man, brought to you
by the director of Bring It On, a writer of Shaun of the Dead and a writer of
Anchorman. There are a lot of personalities coming into this film and there was
a lot of Hollywood drama leading up to it being created. Making it a Paul Rudd
Marvel action comedy was probably a decent idea. The character of Ant-Man can
shrink down to the size of an ant and control the ants and other small insects
around him. It’s no more ridiculous than a man in a flying metal suit or a guy
who turns into a green monster when he’s angry but, like those characters, I’m
sure Marvel will find a way to make him interesting and exciting. It’s been an
uphill battle with this one but, like all other Marvel films, the end result is
to have the character fit into the bigger Marvel Universe. I’m wondering how
the little guy stands out.
Trainwreck is Amy Schumer’s debut as a lead in a
feature film and I’m surprised that it’s taken this long. My guess is that
she’s been too busy making quite a name for herself with stand-up comedy and
her TV show. Teaming her with Judd Apatow and making Bill Hader the second lead
is awesome. Hader is rarely anything more than a minor character in any of the
films he’s been in and usually is the funniest part of any scene he’s in. The
film is about a magazine writer (Schumer) who never had any interest in being
in a relationship and enjoys leading a single life. When she meets a sports
doctor (Hader) and finds herself happy around him, she begins to think it might
be time to end the single life. Lebron James co-stars as does John Cena. Should
be hilarious.
Woody Allen makes
at least one movie a year and this year’s film is called Irrational Man. It’s
labeled a mystery. The description of the film is vague, to say the least, but
I don’t see where the mystery fits in. Joaquin Phoenix plays a tormented, and
therefore popular for some reason, philosophy professor who ‘commits an
existential act’ (not sure what that means) and begins to see the world more
positively. The film also stars Parker Posey and Emma Stone. It all sounds very
strange to me - but then again so does Woody Allen.
We get another
variation of Sherlock Holmes in the film Mr. Holmes, where he is now
played by Ian McKellen. Take that Downey Jr. and Cumberbatch - McKellen gets to
add another name to his repertoire (oh my God, I spelled that right on my first
try) since he’s already played Magneto and Gandalf. In this version, Holmes is
obviously a little older than we’re used to seeing him in recent
interpretations but he is probably wiser and is now looking back on an unsolved
case of his. In my opinion, McKellen is one of those actors who doesn’t know
how to act poorly and I doubt he would disappoint as Sherlock.
Pixels is the latest Adam Sandler film and
while I may not love every film he’s made, I do enjoy a lot of them and I will
definitely see this. It’s directed by Chris Columbus who, after discovering
America, also founded the first two Home Alone films and the first two Harry
Potter films - so he’s awesome. In this film, aliens receive a message from
earth that includes images from classic arcade games like Pac-Man, Donkey Kong,
Space Invaders (HA!) and others. The message is interpreted as a threat so the
aliens use supersized versions of these video game characters to destroy earth.
The president, Kevin James, calls on video game experts played by Adam Sandler,
Josh Gad and Peter Dinklage to save the day. Like I said, awesome.
If you’ve seen
picture of Jake Gyllenhaal lately you might notice that he is freakishly muscular.
He’s huge. It’s scary. He got this way for Southpaw, which is written by
the creator of Sons of Anarchy and directed by the director of Training Day and
several action movies, so aggressive is probably a fair description of this
boxing drama. In it, Gyllenhaal plays a boxer who is dealing with a tragedy and
falls from grace as a top contender. He then figuratively and literally fights
his way to the top.
